WOTBB 7 – The Lady, the Monster and the ‘special’ Cousin

Original date of blog: December 29th, 2014

Now, I think it’s about time that I start writing about the tanks in this game. The game is, after all, all about tanks. You’ll hear more platooning adventures later on, because those never stop happening. As I mentioned before, I’ve been driving the German tank destroyer line. So that is what this entry will be about. Not all tanks are that interesting though, and since those that drive tiers I through III are mostly noobs and can thus be killed by whoever has a little skill, I’ll start at tier IV.

The Hetzer. When I first got it, I was still rather much a noob, and I wrestled myself to the better parts. Winrate didn’t really mean anything to me yet, and the word ‘team’ didn’t either. I learned what sniping meant when I got the top gun on the Hetzer though. I felt all powerful with it, because it allowed me to one-shot tier III tanks. My worst enemy was another Hetzer, because at this point in time I did not yet know what HE ammunition was. All in all, the Hetzer is a fast, agile little thing, with a big mouth. It fits its name (which translates into rabble-rouser).

Next came the Stug III. It’s a tank I was stuck on for a while. It takes quite a bit to upgrade it’s parts, and it didn’t seem as powerful as the Hetzer. Plus, the battles you enter start to get more serious. You can’t just randomly run about and shoot things anymore. You need to use your noggin when tanking. But, all in all, the Stug is a fantastic tank. It is still fast and agile, and it has decent penetration-skills, if not the gun-on-testosterone power the Hetzer has. It’s a nice balance between the complete random of tiers I through III and the seriousness of tiers VIII and higher-battles.

When you have finally managed to scrounge together the coins you need for the Jagdpanzer IV, you absolutely love the tank, but the next one, the Jagdpanther, looks even more enticing. Until you get it. It was the slowest piece of tank I had driven so far, and I absolutely hated it. Once I got it maxed, it seemed alright though, and by then I had already seen the Ferdinand in battle, and had gotten killed by it loads of times, so I knew I wanted to tap that.

And then I got it. I was amazed… at the absolutely unbearable piece of tank it turned out to be. The slowness of the Jagdpanther before it was maxed was absolutely nothing compared to this piece of *naughty word*. Yes, it had a reasonably powerful gun, but against tiers IX and X that you meet from then on, it was next to useless. It seemed to derp all the time, as if it had some kind of birth defect. Not to mention that by the time you got anywhere, the battle would be over. If you tried to turn to face an enemy, they’d have long since drove past you and shot you in the behind often enough to kill you.

But that wasn’t the only downside to this tank. Battles with tiers VIII suddenly get a lot more serious than battles with tier VII ever were. And with the very slow Ferdinand, you have no idea what’s going on, what’s happening, why the game suddenly seems to hate your tush. I was very close to throwing in the towel. Heck, I was very close to throwing my iPad mini against the wall. But I didn’t. I used all the gold I had (even bought some extra for it, I’ll admit), and converted loads of XP from tanks that I could no longer upgrade to free XP. And behold! I suddenly had a much faster, more agile tank, with a much bigger gun.

The crew wasn’t trained yet, but from that moment on I could see the potential of the tank. And when that crew reached 100%… Oh baby! I didn’t mind that it would take forever to reach tier IX and awesome looking Jagdtiger that would be my first tier IX tank. The Ferd was so much fun. It will always remain slow and a little retarded, but it’s really not that bad. It is an excellent tank for sniping, more so than most tank destroyers. It still is a money-eater though, making me lose a few k of money each time I died and my team lost. So I returned to my faithful Stug to earn the most money I could.

After endless battles and much saving up, I got my hands on the Jagdtiger. It is an incredibly sexy looking tank (in my opinion), and she is an elegant one. She is my Lady. Just like the Ferd, she starts out as being incredibly slow, but by then you’re already used to the slowness of the Ferd, so it doesn’t -feel- as slow. Not to mention the fact that almost all tiers IX and especially the tier X tanks are slow, so you don’t feel so excluded anymore either. That, and the gun reloads faster, giving you a better chance to kill off your opponents. I think I’ve had all my best battles with the Jagdtiger (of course, until I got the SU-152, but that is a completely different line of tanks).

When you get the Jagdtiger maxed, you have a smooth running, reasonably fast tank destroyer that can do a lot of damage. But only if you handle her well. Like all ladies, she needs to be driven with a gentle hand, treated with respect. It was one of the tanks I got used to the most quickly, even if I still died a lot when facing tier X’s. For some reason, tier X tanks inspire fear in me when I’m driving a lower tier. They are such massive tanks most of the times, and are hard to hit anywhere. And it’s not very hopeful when I can’t hit the things except for with HE, doing a massive amount of about 50 points of damage per shot (if I’m lucky). That’s about as effective as dropping a snowball into a vulcano…

Platooning the Lady helps a lot though, since my awesome platoon mates will often buy me time or otherwise give me the ability to take my time and shoot the buggers properly, where it hurts and does proper damage. It still took a very long time for me to get to the roughly 270k XP I needed for my Jagdpanzer E100 though, not to mention the money needed. At least I wasn’t losing any more money on the tank, since getting it maxed, steadily earning between 10 and 20k per battle if I was any good. And I was.

Then it was time for tier X. The Jagdpanzer E100 was everything I had expected, yet still less than I had hoped. It is as slow as any tier X tank should be, but it misses shots quite easily, and it turns so slowly. I equipped it with ventilation to get my crew to work better, and chocolate as a consumable to make them even better so I wouldn’t feel it as much. It is still a tank that needs lots of time to become a good tank though. And there’s always the trouble of faster tanks getting behind you. Unlike with the Ferd though, you stand a chance because of your armour. You can take more of a hit and lots of them too!

And oh, the gun, the firepower. It makes me grin like a lunatic whenever I hit the fire-button. Even though it isn’t maxed, and even though I still lose more with it than I win (even with the help of my buds), I still love the big Monster. Because that is what it is, pure and simple. A tank that big, with that kind of gun, that does that kind of damage, is a Monster. You can’t help but feel a shiver shoot up your spine when you hear that canon roar as it fires, of fear when you have it pitted against you, and of excitement when you’re driving the thing. I can’t wait until it’s maxed, knowing it will be even more awesome than it is now.

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